Welcome to Totally Awkward Tuesday ( the brain child of Tova Darling!)
I'm going to make this as short and succinct as possible because I'm at work...eek!!
Alright picture this:
15 years old.
This year in particular I was asked to 2 proms. One at my high school and one at a neighboring high school. The boy that went to the other H.S. was not a favorite of the parents. He was dubbed "jailbird" because he was 16 and had been arrested on a couple of occasions...DUI...Vandalizing. So anyway, for some reason they OK'd me going to prom with him. I think because we were going with three other couples and we were being driven in a limo (hence...no possibility of him driving). I'm getting off on a little bit of a tangent...
I'm bringing it back to the main reason why I am posting...
I ( or my parents did, whatevs) bought 1 dress for me to wear to MY H.S. prom and they actually expected me to wear it to the other prom!! I know?! I totally needed another dress! So I decided I would borrow a dress! ( I'm crafty like that...) I collected a shit load of dresses from my friends took them home and was going to model them for my Mom and Dad to see what they liked ( really...I just wanted to wear all the dresses and have some one ohh and ahh over me) Which my parents did all the required Ohhing and ahhing until I came out prancing in one particular dress. Why I didn't take a good look in the mirror before I came out I have no idea. I mean...I was admiring myself in all the other dresses ( I only wish I had the self-esteem like I did back then...sigh)
So I come out twirling and posing and I see this strange look on my parents faces. I thought maybe it was because it was a little bit more risque' ( ya know..more cleavage showing then the other ones). I said as much to them, but then my mom said very calmly...." Um, Lady Jane what is that?? ( at this time she is pointing to her boob, obviously she did not want to say the word boob) My Dad is getting all flustered ( he is easily flustered in these situations). So I was like "what???" and that's when I looked down and saw the VERY PURPLE HICKEY on the top of my boob!!! This is about the time I wanted to have the floor swallow me whole, but you see Lady Jane is quick thinking and said " Oh that...yeah I got pinched really hard by so and so" and just went on as nothing happened. I KNOW that they did not believe me, but we all felt better if we just pretended it was a pinch. BUT definitely AWKWARD at the very least and just so I can tell you how AWKWARD it was...this Hickey was the mother of all Hickeys and I don't think my Dad quite made eye- contact with me for a couple of days.
And while I was alone with my mom a little bit later..she whispered.."I think you need to be a little bit smarter on where you let people pinch you." Yeah, nuff said!
Just a side note ...my parents NEVER had the "talk" with me..ya know birds and the bees. Its just something that is not comfortable in my family!! We can talk about everybody else's sex life, we talk about each other's poop, we are a very open family...but not about that! I have only witnessed my parens kissing once!! I'm still not sure my brother and I came about:)
So Happy Tuesday!!
The Lady Jane