I'm baaaccckkkk!!!

Ugh.... I have no idea how to even start this!

For starters this is my first time even logging into blogger since....well, my last post!

SO many things have happened since then and to be totally honest the past month I have been avoiding coming back because I felt SO guilty!!

I honestly didn't think that it would really matter that I hadn't posted in awhile so you can imagine my shock and (horror!!) when a month ago I logged into my trippinthroughlife email and I saw e-mails and comments left on my last post wondering where the hell I was and some people thinking that something happened to me. ( was that a run-on sentence, or what?) I probably should have logged on right then and wrote "I'M NOT DEAD!!" but did I? Well, we all know the answer to that one. Instead, I tried to think of something that I could say that would make me not posting for 3 months all OK and nobody would be mad.

YES, I worry that much about what people think. Yes, even people I have never met. Sheesh!

And I came up with NOTHING. A whole month of thinking of just that right thing to say and ....nothing.

Today - I just thought to hell with it - I'll post anyways.

I have no idea where to even start....ALOT has happened. So what I've decided to do is list a bunch of things that have been going on and then all of you can leave a comment saying what you want to hear about first and we will just play it like that:)

OK...HERE WE GO!

1) Another hospitalization
2) a very awkward situation regarding a toilet
3) I quit my job
4) I got new eye glasses
5) I got engaged
6) I started my own business
7) I bought a wedding dress ( a month before I got engaged)
8) The Duke and I are official RVer's (not sure if that is a word)
9) The Duke and I eloped
10) I now steal toilet paper and taco sauce packets
11) I made the Duke very upset.....( this doesn't happen much)

So chime in..... what do you want to hear about. Give me your top 3!

Missed you!! Honestly I did:)

The Lady Jane

Confession Friday: Keys are my Nemesis!!!

Just like the title states:

Keys are my Nemesis!!

I have soooo many key related stories and NONE of them are good. Everybody who knows me...KNOWS that I should not be entrusted with any kind of key for any reason, any time!! Seriously!

So here is Lady Jane's 2,890,560 entry into the lost, misplaced. damaged, broke, etc... KEY CHRONICLES

And this is my Confession: I totally threw my co-worker under the bus, or rather I just let the bus keep running over her...

I know, I know...I feel awful!!!!!!

Here's the story....

In the program that I am based out of there is the teacher, me (social worker) and two para pros. The teacher and I have keys to the doors and filing cabinets. There is also an extra set in a drawer in the teacher's desk..in case one of the Para's need one.

Some time last week I needed to open up a filing cabinet and instead of walking to my desk in the other room ( because I am that lazy) I used the extra set in the desk and true to form..I pocketed it afterwards without thinking.

Cut to Wednesday of this week:

I come into the classroom after being away in the morning for meetings and hear this loud DRILLING....the maintenance guy is there drilling the lock of the filing cabinet. Huh? I saw the teacher and raised my eyebrows..like whats going on here? She comes over very briskly and kind of dramatic like and proceeds to tell me that the keys are missing from her desk and that she knows that one of the para's lost it even though she is saying she didn't.

At first I was just nodding my head as she spoke and not say anything as that is what I usually do when she is venting because honestly she talks louder then she should when she is talking about the paras and to say that it is awkward is an understatement!! So I am nodding and trying to hurry through the venting so I can get away..when all of a sudden I have this flash of memory of ME putting those keys in my pocket! Oh gawd....I did it again! Damn keys...I hate keys with a passion. We just do not have a good relationship..they do not like me either! They are the bane of my existence!! ( I am not being dramatic..they really are! For real!)

A struggle with my conscious ensues... should I admit that it was me that took them or let the teacher believe the para did it....

I chose the latter. Not proud..not proud at all!

I have to but a disclaimer on this***

If the maintenance guy wasn't already drilling a hole into the filing cabinet at that minute...I totally would have fessed up...really I would have! BUT since it had already progressed that far and no one even thought to ask me if I had the keys before calling the maintenance guy then well....I just let them keep thinking that it couldn't possibly have been me. Hey I can hear you judging.. but its my first year there...I have already misplaced the credit card.... ( which they still don't know yet as I am positive that it will show up ..God, do you hear me??)...I can't possibly be responsible for this too!

I know Karma is going to get me on this one... it always does!

Damn Keys!!! **shakes fist**

I'm emotionally drained now..... good night:(

The Lady Jane ( and very bad co-worker...)

Confession Friday...vol.3

I am getting this post in right under the deadline..it is 11:03 right now, but I am committed to doing this confession thing every Friday because it is good for my soul and stuff like that...

So here is my confession:

I hate answering the phone!

I'll even go days without checking messages, I leave it places, and its broke a lot.

I tell everyone about my busted a%# phone and how the # sign doesn't work ( which makes it difficult navigating those annoying automated services) and my space bar doesn't work ( which makes my texts look all jacked up) and many times my caller ID will not work or it just plain does not record a call. Your probably asking "Why the hell don't you get another phone?" 2 reasons...1) I'm lazy 2) I'm broke...simple as that.

So where am I going with all of this...you ask!!

I'm a liar! Well..not in all areas in my life..just one...MY PHONE.

I lie and tell people I didn't get their call
I lie and say my voicemail isn't working when it is
I lie and say "Huh?! I don't understand. I can get text, but it doesn't seem like people are getting mine."

I lie, I lie, I lie

Now it is true that my phone is nuthin' but problems but then I tend to use those problems to my advantage. So when my phone is actually working correctly, I lie and say that its not.

Please know that I love my family and friends!! Its just that they always call when I don't want to talk, so I say to myself "Oh, I will call them back" and then totally forget all about it, so when they ask me if I got their message ....I lie, fib,deceive.....whatevs...you get it

There is a window of opportunity for getting me on the phone and that is either on my way to work or on my way home. Talking on the phone passes the time while I drive...but outside of that window..forget about it. I talk to people all day long and the last thing I want to do when I get home is talk some more. The Duke knows and appreciates this but HATES when I don't answer the phone. You see after several days of my friends not getting a return phone call , they call the Duke to see if I am OK or dead or something to the like. Which how great of friends do I have??? Which is why I feel awful and really do have to start picking up the phone.

Anyways, not answering the phone got me into a huge mess this week.

I got a call from a collections agency..eek!!

They stated my dentist office is making a claim that I owe them 1,600 dollars. I knew this but it is my insurance company that is paying it. Well, obviously they hadn't!! So freaking out and not having and extra 1,600 dollars ( ya know because I am a good saver like that) I called the insurance company which told me that they will send out the check in 30 days, however, the bill collector stated that it might go on my credit report before the 30 days is up. So Super MOM to the rescue. I tell her my sob story about the evil insurance company and the wicked dentist office that never even called me!!! My mom assured me that she would pay it and that I can give her the money as soon as The Evil Insurance company sends me the check.

So she calls the Dentist office to pay. At this point I have to tell you that this is my hometown dentist in a small town where every body knows everybody ( I now live 2 1/2 hrs away)
The receptionist tells my mom that they would have NEVER have turned me into the Collections agency but I never called them back. They also proceeded to tell my lovely mother that they even had the phone company check my number to make sure it was mine and that she even made sure she had witnesses when she left a message ( because she wanted them to see her dial and hear her to make sure she was doing it right...whatever) Apparently they left a TON of messages.

As you can imagine I got a very angry phone call from my mom and she really called me to the carpet about my very rude and hurtful phone etiquette and that she KNOWS that I don't answer the phone, check messages...and on and on. Really the phone call went on soooo long that I don't have the strength to even recite a tenth of it.

In my defense....I truly do not believe that they called and left messages that many times. I KNOW I suck about the phone, but c'mon I think I would have received a couple of them and I am not stupid enough to ignore those messages!! But since I have a rep and I have lied so much...Karma came and bit me in the ass hard, like with teeth marks!!

So I now solemnly swear to answer my phone and at least check my messages every day AND return phone calls immediately.

Really I'm not lying!!

I think the phone is ringing...ahhhhhhhhh

THE LADY JANE ( reformed liar)

Confession Friday and the Po Po!!!

What am I doing you ask?

Oh, just completing a statement form for the Police.

Why am I doing that you ask?

Because the kids I work with are mofo crazy!!

Is it because of the kid you mentioned last week that made journal entry about slaughtering you all like cows?

No. The statements are about two different situations regarding two different kids

Is this the first time you had to make a statement?

Actually this is my second one this week.

What happened you ask?

Which time? Out of 5 school days, the police had to come for 4 of them.
And yes, you read it correctly 4 F#$CK*NG times!!


One of several reasons I keep this blog anonymous is because of what I do for a living and because of the kids I work with. I truly care about about these boys and feel terrible about what they have to deal on a day to day basis in just trying to keep it together. However, they troll the internet looking for info on us staff either for humor or for their lawsuit of the week.
I may feel like I want to cry during the day but after their gone and I think about what they say and do...I laugh until I cry. They are certainly entertaining!

1st police visit came on Monday when the teacher , me, the boy ( who wrote the homicidal journal entry), his mom, our superintendent, and the police representative met.

The 2nd time they came is because one kid beat the hell out of another kid in the classroom and also punched a couple of staff members in the process who were trying to break it up. No, not me I made the phone call for back up. I should note that since starting work there this school year I have been punched twice, just not this time. Yay for me! Oh yeah and they started fighting because of who was going to be the banker in Monopoly..isn't that precious?

The 3rd time the police had to come is because one of the boys ( who is new to us and has only been there a month) made verbal threats to us and also toward two of the students. ( Things like "I am going to choke you till your head pops off your neck" (to another student) Then when the teacher and I confronted him - he tried to intimidate us with his size and **staring us down** his trademark move.

Side note- this kid is 6 foot 4 inches and WELL over two bills. He considers himself "EMO" very dark. Wears crazy eyeliner, paints around his eyes red. He came to us after he was in the psych ward. Which isn't a big deal because all our kids go there at one time or another. However, this kid went there after he beat his mom with a baseball bat till she was unconscious. Why is he not in Juvie you ask? Great question!!! He was supposed to be. Oh...did I mention that two months before that he held a knife to the throat of his mom while the police surrounded his house.....

Anyways, after he threatened us and did his staring thing he left the building....with our headphones! For some reason the teacher and I thought we really needed to have those headphones back. HEY! they were school property and he LEFT the building!!!!! We did ask for him to hand them over several times.

Long story short ..we followed him..had the police called...and he was picked up.

Supposedly, they are trying once again to lock him up, but since we didn't hear anything. My guess is he will be back on Monday. AAHHHH.......

4th reason the police had to come. One of our other kids did not like the fact that he was going to be in In School Suspension that day and went a little bonkers and refused to take his meds. We called for back up ( some men teachers) and we had to move the kid to the boom boom room. (The padded room). Whereas...the kid tried to take the door off the hinges by ramming his body into it several times. Lots of threats...some against us , some against himself. Soo...a mobile crisis team came to assess which resulted in the police taking said student and transporting him to the hospital. Phew..... There were several other things he did but those were the highlights.

Today, we completely spoiled the boys that are on the upper levels ( our behaviors system). We took them outside to the football field to play around and then ordered pizza for them and let them play X-box in the afternoon. For the first time when said "thank you" several times and smiled ....I knew it was genuine and My heart melted! !!

Confession for this Friday: I took complete and udder joy in parading the pizzas by the kids that are currently serving ISS. I sooo did not have to take the route that went by them. Funniest part...is one of the boys that is in ISS yelling " IS THAT PIZZA???? IS THAT FIVE DOLLAR HOT AND READY PIZZA? WHO IS EATING PIZZA????" and starts to whimper and kick walls while swearing to himself and me with my back to him smiling ear to ear and not answering one of those questions....can you say passive-aggressive??

So I'm ECSTATIC its the weekend!!!

Sorry for this entry being kinda dry with not a lot of wit...but I am tooo exhausted to try to be clever. So as the police say..."Just the facts, ma'am'"

THE LADY JANE ( crazy ass school social worker that voluntarily accepted a job working in a classroom of kids that are severely emotionally impaired mixed with a couple of sociopaths)

Confession Friday

I titled this post "Confession Friday" and who knows maybe I will make it an every Friday thing. I'm thinking that somebody I'm sure already does it, but I don't know who that person is.... so its all good:)


Anyways, I believe a week ago today ( or tomorrow. I'm too lazy too look) i made a post about all I was going to get done over Spring Break, well...ummmm...that didn't exactly happen. I did, however, get together with my friends and did a lot of drinking. Hey...connecting with my friends was on that list...go look!! Point being I didn't get as much done as I would have hoped. So now with three days left, I'm going to put it in overdrive.

So here is my confession....I am not a good housekeeper nor very observant.... here is the proof!


I bought groceries yesterday...finally! When I was putting them away, I noticed there was this funk coming from our refrigerator. Well, there was a lot of containers in there that needed to be cleaned out and that's when I uncovered this:

This was a nice crisp healthy salad like 3 maybe 4 weeks ago!! When I pulled off the cover I was gagging so hard..I did have to choke back vomit. The stench was.....words can't describe!! Everything was congealed and moldy..ugh..oops..throwing up a little bit right now..just thinking about it....

Just one more pic...its an important one. See the black slime when I tipped it?! See it? Ugh...

So there was no way I was going to put that down in our garbage disposal... I don't think putting all the lemons in the world down with it could cover this smell.

So I tied a shirt around my face ( robber style) went out to my yard...poured sludgy contents into a bag and put it out in the trash can. I thought that would take care of it...oh no... the smell has permeated our yard (where some contents did not quite make it in the bag) and now the garage because I tied it up in a bag and put it in the trash can.

I can't believe this little ol' salad has made this much of a stink! A neighbor actually commented that our street was starting to smell like sewage and asked me if I could smell it!! There was no way that I was telling him it was because of me!

Oh and I wish I could say that was all I found in the fridge that falls in the "that's so disgusting I could puke" category, but it is the one that won't seem to go away!! I won't even park my car in the garage. I'm afraid its going to be like that Seinfeld Episode..where they couldn't get the BO smell out of the car. You know what I'm talking about!!

So there just goes to show ya that it doesn't always pay off to eat healthy!!

Oh and BTW The Duke informed me that the bowl that the salad was in was actually a "salad spinner/dryer thingy" and not a "salad storage thingy"...whoops:)

The Lady Jane

My name is Lady Jane and I am an addict....

I have a confession.... I am a full blown addict of ETSY!!

If you don't already know..ETSY is a website dedicated to buying and selling all things handmade. If you don't know about it...check it out.

I need a fix daily. Its all I can think about when I am at work and can't wait to get home and log on to browse the lovely items and read all the articles. Its a real problem people..... but since I have this addiction why not share it with everyone:)) I plan on at least once a week showcasing a few items that have caught my eye.

PURSES...let me tell ya right know...I love purses and jewelry...I mean love them!!

First up....these first two gorgeous creations are designed by Made By Hank. When you get to her shop there are more views of the purses including the inside and back. I just love them!!!!

Cute right?????

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MY BLOG DESIGN

Some have commented on my blog design and wondered where I got it or if I did it myself. Well, its a big fat NO for the question "did I do it myself". Don't get me wrong I tried...but I'm loser at all things technology! Really I am!

My design is courtesy of a designer on you guessed it...ETSY.

ETSY has this great feature called ALCHEMY. On Alchemy you can post a custom piece that you would like designed and made. You type a description of you want, when you want it, and how much you would like to pay. Then other designers/artists bid on it and you pick who you ultimately want. How great is that???

I looked at all the blog design websites and if you wanted anything custom - it was extremely expensive and anything that was a pre-made..wasn't what I was looking for. So I decided to try ALCHEMY. And I had 5 bids within the first 2 hours. I ultimately picked DoLollies. She was amazing to work with...very easy!!!! I recommend her to anyone who would like to change up their blog!! Also, if you look over at my blogroll - I have her personal website on their ( she advertises that she does blog design on there) Her Blog is Actually Laura.

I hope everyone is having a great weekend and that they keep coming back here...even after my last disgusting post. Hey it was TMI Thursday..what so you expect??

The Lady Jane